Rec: Can't Take You Anywhere

[janeturenne.livejournal.com]

Annnnnd back to the lighter side as we begin the week.

Can't Take You Anywhere

Pairing: Theta/Koschei, a dollop of Ten/Simm
Length: 2.5k
Rating: PG-13
Warnings: Painfully cute? In an entirely good way, mind
Author on LJ (or Teaspoon, or Prydonian): randomfandom93
Why this must be read: Sometimes, in this fandom full of codependency, Issues and angst, a fangirl or fanboy needs a good injection of industrial-strength fluff, and here it is. If you think the only thing a story about Theta and Koschei going to the Russian ballet on Valentine's Day could possibly be is cloying, you're figuring without the part where this fic is howlingly, laugh-out-loud funny, which absolutely makes it all work. And rather warming, too, in spite of the PG-13 rating. If you're looking for something sweet, light, and undeniably fun, with great characterization and fabulous banter, this is IT.




As the Prince captured the mysterious and elusive Firebird and she fought back, swaying rhythmically with the music, Theta’s voice brought him out of his pleasant haze.

“…Beware, mortal, for these lands and all in them belong to Koschei the Immortal.”

Koschei gave a momentary start, before turning an incredulous look on the smirking boy beside him.

“Thought you’d like that.”

Allowing a languid smirk to grow across his face as well, Koschei leaned in to reply. “Are you telling me we’ve really come all this way for a cheap joke?”

“Mmmm…well, what the hell else are you going to do in Soviet Russia?”

The performance continued, as Prince Ivan went to seek out the great and terrible wizard.

Theta’s narration continued as well.

“Now Ivan enters the lair of the great wizard, filled with gold and jewels, sacrificed princesses and slaves, tribute from every Kingdom in the land, to beg for mercy…”

Koschei resisted the urge to shift uncomfortably. Theta’s voice seemed to have dropped several octaves, his lips nearly grazing Koschei’s ear, cool breath slipping down his neck to dissipate below his collar.

The music swelled and took on a new level of intensity, as the Wizard’s first appearance drew near, smoke and issuing from the floor, where a rotating trapdoor began to rise.

“All hail our Lord and Master, Koschei the Great,” Theta murmured, before finally closing those final inches to press a kiss to Koschei’s neck, hands coming up to card through his hair, as he suckled on his pounding pulse point, feeling the hammering of the four-beat of Koschei’s hearts under the tip of his tongue.



Link to the story: Can't Take You Anywhere